Conflict is inevitable, yet it can be controlled and minimized. How an individual or a group responds to conflict and the behavior towards the situation determines the negative or positive outcome of the disagreement. If conflict is mishandled or not properly managed by the parties involved, then an unproductive and unlikely result will be generated.
Have you ever been in a fight or argument with an office colleague because of clash of interest or attitude and you cannot seem to meet in the middle? We call this destructive conflict. This type of conflict produces poor quality decisions from the individuals, discourages learning, and can even be the cause of harm to the individual or the group.
Factors causing Destructive Conflict
In the workplace, people or groups who are in a disagreement have a reason for such conflict. We do not just argue with each for no reason at all. For destructive conflict, there are quite a few reasons.
A very common factor is power struggle or a principle that they can win a certain issue that is of great importance to them. Lack of skill in managing conflict is also another factor. Destructive conflicts are also caused by lack of empathy or the inability to understand the point of view of the other. The feeling of hopelessness also makes people resort to negative conflict.
Other factors would include the fear of change or the feeling of anxiety when forced to get out of the comfort zone, ideological beliefs, and personal vulnerability or invulnerability. Some people stick to their personal viewpoints and oppose ideologies that are not personally acknowledged. Others are too vulnerable towards the situation in a way that they react negatively because they feel threatened.
Recognizing Destructive Conflict
When engaged in a conflict, learn whether the situation may turn out to be positive or not. But in any case, always be ready for whatever the outcome will be. There are indicators when a conflict is likely to turn out destructive.
One is the attitude of confrontation, dominance, or aggression toward the other party. You might be in a disagreement with a coworker who starts to talk you over or hurt you verbally. Beware as this is becoming a negative conflict. Or a boss might start to abuse his power and manipulate the situation.
Another characteristic of a destructive conflict is when individuals or groups start using differences as divisions. For example, one party might take advantage of the weakness of the other when it comes to making decisions.
It also becomes destructive when the communication becomes a one-way street. Both parties become resistant to change, personalize issues, and take things on a personal level. The ideas become irrational and they become closed-minded.
Some tend to avoid communication at all and would use a third-party instead. Because of this, other people start to get involved. People who take conflicts negatively aim at retaliating or getting even rather than arriving at a settlement. Worse, even attempts of coercion may be possible.
Managing Destructive Conflict
If the conflict becomes negative and unproductive for both parties, either the individuals or the group involved should take action to slow things down and take responsibility for a process in resolving disputes. Bear in mind that it will never be a win-win situation if neither will initiate a constructive process.
A way to handle destructive conflict is to acknowledge the problem and make use of power and influence positively to resolve it. Persuasion will be an effective approach to let the other realize that both parties should gain ground.
Having a professional mindset in facing a dispute or disagreement is also important. Matters should not be taken personally. Use positive language and provide constructive feedback and criticism. Keeping a positive outlook is also essential to maintaining a diplomatic process.
Destructive conflict is unavoidable in the workplace since every individual is unique and different in thinking, values, and attitude. But as professionals, matters should be handled the way a professional is expected to manage them.
After all, the adverse effects of an unresolved conflict would still affect the individuals or groups involved and can even greatly affect the organization. So, resolve conflicts constructively for the common good.